Cover photo for Sharon Marie Dexter's Obituary
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Sharon Marie Dexter

April 14, 1934 — September 25, 2024

Clyde

Sharon Marie Dexter

Sharon Marie Dexter, born April 1934, to Dorothy Nelson Dexter and Everett Dexter of Long Lake, Minnesota, was their first-born, and a very much loved and wanted child. She was adorable, with big blue eyes and golden curls, and in keeping with the fashion of the times, dressed like Shirley Temple. She was also quite head-strong and gave her parents much to keep them from ever being bored. She loved nature and the outdoors with all its flora and fauna from the very start of her life and was an insatiable tree-climber and explorer. In all four seasons she found things to enjoy, and though she loved storms, sunshine was better. There were many animals always around her: cats, dogs, rabbits, horses, sheep, small furry creatures and birds she nursed back to health if she found them sick or injured. But especially cats—they became loving companions throughout her entire life. Sharon's sense of humor was wry, and even with her softspoken voice sometimes sharp—she didn't miss much. She was full of energy, which lasted nearly her whole life, an Energizer Bunny in all regards. Never bored even when stuck inside during a Minnesota winter, she loved to read books and listen to music, especially classical but some eclectic folk as well, and she played piano herself.

Sharon was an "only child" until her sister, Lane Ann Dexter, was born in 1942. A second floor was added to her parents' house on the west shore of Long Lake, and both girls had their own rooms. But there was rationing, and shortages of all kinds. Everett worked many odd jobs, including cutting ice blocks from the lake and storing them in an ice cellar, then in warmer seasons hauling them by horse and cart to customers in Minneapolis. He was a carpenter and furniture maker by trade, but also became mayor of Long Lake for several terms in the 1960s. His entrepreneurial spirit was inherited by both his girls. Laney taught as a music therapist, then became Director of the Fraser School in Minneapolis, one of the first schools to integrate children with learning disabilities such as Down Syndrome or autism with children able to learn without impairment. Her techniques were innovative and progressive. Unfortunately, she developed Hodgkin's Disease in her early 30s, and though it went into remission for years after treatment from Mayo and the University of Minnesota, she died at age 50.

After graduating from the University of Minnesota with a Bachelor of Science in Education, Sharon began teaching kindergarten. She loved it! Her gift of teaching and relating to small children was a delight. In 1957, she married Jim Haehlen, who also received his teaching degree from the University of Minnesota (they met commuting from Long Lake together) and taught American History most of his career at Wayzata Junior High School. In June 1961, they had a daughter, Heidi, and Sharon gave up her teaching to work and care for her at home, which was a small house in Plymouth. She began to use her creativity to make many kinds of arts and crafts and interior design projects, including antique restoration, and to work as a volunteer in diverse organizations. In August 1965, daughter Suki was born. That preceding summer season, Sharon and Jim had bought a piece of land adjacent to her parents in Long Lake, and they designed a Cape Cod-style house and built it. They would all live there until 1977, when they moved out to Loretto, where they had again designed and built a house, this time in the saltbox style. The house was not completed in time however, and the family, including an AFS Intercultural Programs exchange student named Azita from Iran, moved into their camping trailer for a few months. Luckily, everyone loved camping!

When Sharon was 16, she went west to Oregon and stayed the summer with an aunt and uncle. It was lifechanging, in that although she would always create a beautiful space and a welcoming home around her, she also loved the adventure of travel. Throughout her life, she journeyed across the Northern and Western States and Central to Eastern Canada, almost always camping (with cats and dogs along of course), then to Germany, Austria and Switzerland in the early 80s, and to Texas and New Mexico in the 90s, the UK in the early 2000s, back to Oregon in 2007 where Heidi and her husband Dudley were living, Arizona to visit a lifelong friend, and finally to North Carolina in 2015, where Heidi and Dudley had moved. Her favorite place of all was the North Shore of Lake Superior in Minnesota. There were many, many camping trips that included hiking (and getting lost in bogs!), blueberry picking, rockhopping, campfires with s'mores, and much laughter and good rest In her later years, with Suki or a friend, there were favorite cabins where they would stay, plus some shopping trips to art galleries and folk craft shops, and outfitter stores as well. But she still hiked! As recently as 2019, she hiked over 2 miles with Heidi and Dudley at Forestville Mystery Cave State Park, Fillmore County, Minnesota. She could see the beauty in a single wildflower and was always bringing home treasure from her hikes: a feather, an autumn leaf, uniquely colored lichen or moss, a rock polished smooth and round, but especially sticks, and most especially, driftwood!

Growing up during the Depression and World War II taught Sharon a thriftiness that she lived by her entire life. Yet it was balanced by her generous heart: after years of family celebrations, she continued to make the most wonderful gift bags and boxes for her girls at birthdays and holidays, and for friends and neighbors all around her. And she gave to organizations around the world, even when her income dropped in 2008-2009. She was so creative at making things fun, colorful, and often beautiful with very little. In addition to supporting local artists wherever she lived, she also loved to bargain shop, especially at TJ Maxxl But her taste was exquisite, and she had the knack for giving a person something that would delight them.

Sharon and Jim's marriage ended in 1980, and she chose to go into a new career of caregiving. First as Activities Director in a Minneapolis nursing home, then she went back to the University of Minnesota and got her Home Healthcare Aide Certification. Even though she had always been afraid of tests, and called herself stupid too many times, she had a 4.0 GPA, and was truly academically successful. She began as a caregiver visiting people's homes, then cared for two people consecutively in her own home over several years: her sister, and a person who became her best friend. After those heartbreaking times, she drew upon her entrepreneurial abilities and turned her historic St. Paul duplex into a B&B called At Home, where she met people from all over the world. As a quietly progressive advocate for women, her marketing was directed primarily for women traveling alone. Eventually after meeting two women from Southeastern Minnesota, Sharon decided to “retire" to Preston in 1999, and opened a gift and interior design shop named The March Hare in nearby Lanesboro very soon after. That shop was beloved by tourists and locals alike, and people still spoke fondly of her and it 10 years after she had to close it. The move was not easy though: Sharon's first and only granddaughter, Megan, was born to Suki and her husband Dave in June of 1999. She would drive up whenever she could to visit for the next 14 or so years, and the family would visit her as well. Suki shared her love of gardening, and many visits together included trips to the nearest greenhouse.

The 90-year-old English-style cottage in Preston where Sharon lived with her cats, a dog and a rabbit for 22 years was a charming place, with a certified wildlife sanctuary in the backyard, gardens all around, and antiques and folk art collections inside. It was beautiful. She was happy there and remained very active, and was, as a friend described her, "agile but fragile", until multiple falls with resulting Traumatic Brain Injuries made it too difficult to stay in her cottage, even with caregivers. She moved down to North Carolina with her two cats to live in a specialized care facility close to Heidi and Dudley in 2021. Many, many friends and family were sad for her to go. It was a difficult time. Her astute observation and judge of character never failed her; there were times when she worried about other residents in the care facility, whom she called "the children". But she was cheerful and polite to her caregivers most of the time, some of whom became good friends.

On September 25, 2024, after a lengthy time in hospice, Sharon passed away peacefully with Heidi and Dudley present. She lived a life of beauty all around her, even in her last moments when her breaths became musical tones. She was an amazing person, deeply loved and greatly missed.

Sharon did not want any kind of memorial. If you would like to plant flowers, a shrub or a tree for her, she would love that. Or make a donation to the organization of your choice in honor of her love of nature and philanthropic spirit.

The care of Sharon Dexter has been entrusted to Wells Funeral Home of Waynesville

To order memorial trees in memory of Sharon Marie Dexter, please visit our tree store.

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